HOW TO LOOK GROWN UP

Don’t let my shock of gray hair fool you: I struggle every day with looking grown up. More specifically, I struggle with looking similar to a grown woman instead of the surly nihilist constantly hunting for the nearest roller disco that I truly am. At 31, I still embody Britney’s Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman persona, whether I want to or not. I’m sure I’m not the only person finding themselves stuck between Charlotte Russe and Ann Taylor. Fashion in your thirties is a tough tightrope to walk and today, I want to walk it with you. Hold my hand though, ok? We’re in this together. 

I took this picture in the early evening. We really are in this together.

GET A DAMN SKIN ROUTINE

Everything in life that is of any importance is something we need to “start early” on, and skin care is no different. Also, side note: I hate this fact. I do not want to start early on anything. I want to be fashionably late and yes, that does include my 401K (not really, please girls make sure you’re enrolled). 

Not only will a skin routine actually help your skin and make you look healthier, it’s also really important for the grown up in your head. When you’re diligent with your skin routine, other good habits begin to fall into place. Like, I do my daily skin routine and then there’s this voice in my head whispering eat more fruit. Wow, what a life hack. Fruit and moisturizer? Get Britney back on the phone, we’re feeling lucky

BUY ANKLE PANTS, YA GROWN UP

Look, just do it, ok? Ankle dress pants are flattering for every body type, they are professional without looking like you work for a car dealership, and you can pair myriad shoes with them. Get a navy pair before you buy a black pair. Navy matches everything (except black), works great with every skin tone, and is just a more exciting base to build your grown up outfit on. 

More than the pants, though, is the overall look. Can’t afford designer brands? I have excellent news: no one can! That’s why it’s important to remember these key few rules when shopping fast fashion: 

THE RULES

You want to make sure your clothes fit. It sounds obvious, but it seriously is not. Make sure the material you’re buying isn’t too stretchy. For example, I bought a pair of navy ankle pants that would stretch so significantly in the first 15 minutes of wear that I would have the infamous saggy butt by the time I entered the office. Wearing clothes that truly, correctly fit makes an immeasurable positive difference in your wardrobe, even if your fashion choices are slightly off base for the season.

You also want to shop contemporary and yes – before you start moaning – this does involve looking into current fashion trends. Please do not get too discouraged – oftentimes, learning the latest trends is as simple as a two minute google search. You can ask – what jeans are in? How should I wear my hair? Honestly – it’s really easy. And when in doubt, just call yourself avant-garde and soak up the compliments. But let’s remember, at the end of the day…

COMB YOUR HAIR

Honestly, just comb your goddamn hair. I cannot stress this enough. Just fucking brush it. It’s the biggest difference in your appearance you can make. Thank me later.

IT’S ALL ABOUT CONFIDENCE

At the end of the day, the most important part of looking like a grown up is being comfortable in your own skin. If my tips and tricks don’t work for you, do not use them. Make sure you are always staying true to yourself! Unless, of course, that involves not brushing your hair. Seriously. Brush your hair. Oh my god. Love you!

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